Monday, September 26, 2016

Contrasts (Grief and Miracles)

As I look back over the last month since my last post, I am struck by the contrasts we have experienced in this ministry. We have seen deep grief as well as great miracles of provision and guidance. We have seen obstacles and open doors, sometimes in the very same moments. And, through it all, we continue to see how very good God is.

First, the grief and obstacles…



On September 9th I lost my friend, Wilson. You may remember that he was a part of a miracle some months back while we were working in Canillá, Quiché. He was brought in by his parents to Las Maripositas, the center in which we work, and he was in bad shape. He had broken his neck months before and, due to a poor surgery to fuse his spine, was in constant pain. In addition, he had severe and infected bed sores on his lower back. We treated him and trained his family, and it was when we were done that we heard his mother’s story.

She told us that she had been praying and fasting for nine days for help for her son. She ended her fast the night before and went to bed. In her dream, she saw people she did not know laying hands on Wilson to bring healing. She woke up and described her dream to a neighbor who told her, “I know that place!” So they loaded Wilson in a neighbor’s pick-up and brought him to Las Maripositas. After we were done treating him, as they were leaving, his mother approached me with tears in her eyes and said, “You were in my dream!”

Over the coming months we continued to treat Wilson, with the team at Las Maripositas taking responsibility for daily bandage changes, and he made progress. His infection cleared and his sores began to heal. But, through it all, he was angry and bitter. His parents are rather legalistic, and they had told them that he had broken his neck because he went to a dance and danced with a girl. His injury was God’s punishment. As a result, he saw God as angry and not loving. But we continued to minister to him, along with the incredible team from Las Maripositas. And we all spoke to him of God’s great love for him.

About a month prior to his death, he went to church. At the end of the service, he asked to be pushed forward to the altar. And, there, he made his peace with God. The difference was immediate and amazing. Gone was the anger which had now been replaced by peace. There was an entirely different spirit about him, and it was beautiful. And with this peace came his desire to stop fighting and to go be with God. He refused his medications, including his antibiotics, and his infection returned. His parents were frantic, wanting to force medicines into him, but we told them that they needed to respect his decision.

During this time, I visited him. I was struck by the peace and joy that I saw in him. I asked him if it was true that he didn’t want to fight any more. He looked me in the eye and said, “Yes.” I told him that I respected that decision and understood why he wanted to go be with God and be free of his broken body. And the last words I spoke to him were, “I will see you soon, either in this life or the next.”

When the message came that he was gone, I smiled and cried at the same time. I miss him, but I will see him soon in his perfectly healed body. Sometimes God brings us to a person to save their lives. Sometimes He brings us to a person so that we can walk them home. Wilson is home.

And then, the following week, we learned of another death, and this one was more unexpected and difficult. On the first week of September we visited Jalapa, and stopped in to see Maria. Maria is 21, has cerebral palsy, and is receiving sponsorship to help with her malnutrition. While we were there, we met her new niece, Brenda. She was one month old, and very underweight. She was born at three pounds, but had gained weight and was four pounds at the time of our visit. As I held her and checked her tiny body, I became convinced that she had cerebral palsy. But, not wanting to deliver this difficult news to the family without being sure, said nothing and decided to wait another month and then arrange to have her checked out with our neurologist. I honestly did not believe that she was in immediate crisis since she was gaining weight. So, I waited.
On September 15th I received a message that she had died just two hours before. I was devastated by both grief and guilt. I should have done something immediately. It was my fault she was dead. I spent several hours in self-condemnation.

Eventually, the truth of God broke through and reminded me that I am not God. Hindsight is 20/20, but none of us have perfect foresight. There was no indication that she was in danger, and there was no indication that anything we could have done would have saved her. I am not God, and I don’t want to be. He is in control, I am not. I have to do my best and trust God with the results.

So, we grieve for Brenda. But we know where she is, and we know she is whole.

When I received the word of Brenda’s passing, I was sitting in a hospital room with our little Edy. Edy has severe brain damage that has affected his brain stem. As a result, he struggles with breathing problems, including apnea. On a regular basis, he will stop breathing for up to a minute. The neurologist has told us that this will likely worsen, and he will not live long as a result. We have been told to expect that one day he will just stop breathing and not start again. This has been hard news to receive. 

And, because of this poor respiration, he is prone to respiratory infections and fluid on the lungs. This was the case when we had to rush him to the hospital on the morning of September 15. And that also happens to be Independent Day here in Guatemala.

Wanda and I left the home in our van with the intent of rushing Edy to the hospital. But we only made it a few hundred yards before we were stopped by a gathering in our town’s park. The street was closed and filled with people. I jumped out and yelled that we had an emergency and were taking a child to the hospital. Everyone quickly cooperated and moved to the side so we could pass. But the obstacles were not all behind us.

We made it to the top of the mountain only to find the street closed for a parade. I got the attention of a police officer and explained the situation. He looked panicked and said, “There is no way to pass!” But then he suddenly said, “Wait! There is an ambulance at the front of the parade!” He then ran off to tell the paramedics while I grabbed Edy and started running through the parade. I was half way through the crowd when the paramedics met me and we all ran together and jumped in the ambulance and sped away.

For the second time in Guatemala I experienced a high speed ride in the back of an ambulance. Speed bumps and bouncy roads were ignored as we whipped through San Lorenzo, Panorama and Antigua. We were met at the hospital door by the doctor, and were in an exam room in 30 seconds. Five minutes later we were being taken into a hospital room and they began starting an IV. I called Wanda at that point and learned she was still sitting and waiting for the parade to pass.

Edy was diagnosed with pneumonia and was admitted for two days. His pneumonia has cleared up, and he is home, but he is struggling with spasms now. His apnea has worsened significantly, and he seems to be weakening. I don't believe he has much longer to live. We have begun to prepare our staff and family for his passing. A part of that preparation is to remind them that one of us will be caring for him when he passes, but that person will not be to blame. In fact, they will have the privilege of placing him in the arms of Jesus. We have lost four children from our home in the last three years, but it does not get easier. Please pray for this little guy. We don’t know how much longer we will have him, but he has a family that loves him, and we will walk him home.

Now, the miracles…

Our friends, Greg and Helaine Walton, run Las Maripositas in Quiché. They are new to that area, but they are not new to Guatemala. They have lived in this country for 19 years, and have previously served in Zona Reina. There they established a school and a farm that produces the fruit and vegetables that they use to produce salsa, coffee, marmalade and more. These are sold and help to fund the school and other ministries.

This is a very remote region of Guatemala. They have cut in a grass landing strip there to make it more accessible in emergencies. But the only other way in is a rough drive on a rough road through several mountain streams. The government calls this part of Guatemala “Zona Obscura” (The Dark Zone) because it is so remote and so little is known about it.

There is a six bedroom home there, and the Waltons have offered it to us to use if we can help to oversee the school. This would be a strategic area of ministry because it is so remote, yet it is surrounded by 89 villages. And there are no resources for people with special needs. The needs of the region are huge, and this would position us as a city on the hill from which we could minister. What an opportunity!

Upon hearing of this possibility, Wanda began to brainstorm. Within an hour she had hatched a brilliant plan that would enable us to minister in that area for one week a month while overseeing the school. And my mind began to race.

Only one problem…finances. I do not talk about money in this blog or other communications. We do not fundraise for our ministry. We have chosen to base our ministry on the George Mueller model, which it to ask God instead of man. We have been overwhelmed by other ministries in the past which always seemed to be asking for money, and we do not want to be that kind of ministry. So, when we have a financial need we pray, and God prompts people to give. It has truly served us well, as God has always provided. We have never lacked for anything that we have truly needed.

Having said that, our ministry has been running at a deficit. We are spending more each month than is coming in through regular giving. However, at just the right moment we will receive a large gift or a few medium sized gifts that will help us through a month or more. Over and over this happens when we need it most.

Lately things have been getting tight again. So, when this opportunity was presented to us, I began to do some calculating of finances. We cannot just drive into this region with our current vehicles. The streams get deep and the roads get rough. Our 4x4’s will all have to be equipped with snorkels and winches, and those are not cheap. In addition, we have not been able to afford the ambulance conversion to the Hilux pick-up that we had committed to do.

So, with us running at a deficit and needing to add all these extra expenses, could we really do it? I have run this ministry by the Hudson Taylor philosophy which says, “God’s work done in God’s way never lacks God’s supply.” This means that I only need to ask myself two questions: 1) Are we doing God’s work? 2) Are we doing it God’s way? If the answer is yes to both of these, we can rest in God’s provision, knowing it will be there.

So, I spend a lot of time praying and listening. I want to make sure we only do what God asks us to do and that we are doing it His way. I know my personality. I am an idea guy who can be bold and reckless at times. It would be very easy for me to, in my excitement, run ahead of God or take off on a tangent. And, if I do, God would be under no obligation to provide. He provides for His call, not my ideas and desires.

So, in light of the financial deficit and the cost involved in expanding to the new area, was God really asking us to expand and go? Or was this just one of Daryl’s reckless dreams?

So, I prayed and listened and prayed some more. On Monday we had a staff meeting and we prayed together. Later that morning I had an online conference with Don Riley, our Liberian Director. He and I have been friends and prayer partners for years, so we prayed together.

And God answered.

On Monday afternoon I was scheduled to meet with Gary Newton, the Pastor of Living Waters Church in Michigan. We had met over three years before when he connected with me through my blog. His church had blessed us with several donations, including a large amount of water filters. He had written and told me that he would be in Guatemala and would like to meet with me while he was here. So, on Monday afternoon, I picked-up him and his friend, Steve, and brought them back to our home. We talked and caught-up, and they were able to see our home and ministry up-close. And then they rocked my world.

Gary pulled out two envelopes and handed them to me. He told me that they had put out the word and asked for donations for our ministry, and the people responded. One 15 year old boy had raised a pig for FFA, and sold it at the fair. Instead of using that money to fix up a pick-up truck he had bought, he gave it to our ministry. Four teenage girls combined their savings and gave it to our work instead of buying clothes and shoes. The church gave.

I asked Gary how much was inside, and he said, “Four and six.” I was thrilled thinking that we were blessed with gifts of $400 and $600. But then he set me straight. It was $4000 and $6000! And I began to weep! In one swoop, God had provided all that we needed to do the ambulance conversion, upgrade our vehicles and even replenish our rural village ministry account that had dropped extremely low. And I had the answer I needed!

Currently the Hilux is being converted to an ambulance, and we expect to have it back in three weeks. I am working on arranging the snorkel and winch work for both trucks. And plans are proceeding full steam ahead. And I am, once again, reminded of God’s faithfulness.

I am often overwhelmed by this ministry. It can be scary at times, as I feel ill-equipped and unprepared to lead an organization that is growing so quickly. But God keeps reminding me of one thing: I don’t need to know all the answers. I don’t need to have all the skills. I just need to make sure that I stick close to Him. If I do, He will lead and He will provide. And I cannot explain what a relief that is!

Blessings from Guatemala!

Daryl, Wanda and the Crew