Saying Goodbye

Friday, July 24

From the moment a ministry trip is planned, this day is the day I dread…the last day in Guatemala. The reason is different than you might think. Unlike vacations when I can find myself hesitant to leave behind the relaxation and head back to the daily work schedule, the dread I face today is rooted in something entirely different. It centers on saying goodbye to children whom I have come to consider my own.

After another busy day that started out, once again, at Hermano Pedro and was followed by more work at Los Gozosos, I found myself back at HP with Gloria, Louis, Delmi, Big Melvin, Little Melvin, Hugo, Henry, Brenda, Diego, Moieses, Elmer, Minor, Roberto, Leonel, and a host of other precious children. And as the time approached for us to leave, my heart broke. How do I leave behind these children I love so much?

One by one I helped tuck them into their cribs and went to each of the 43 cribs in two wards to touch every child. I told them each “Te amo” (I love you) and gave them each a kiss. And as I walked out into the courtyard I found quiet place to weep.

As the day draws to an end I realize that many of these little ones will wake up tomorrow and look for me to return. But by the time they start their day I will be in the air in route to a different country. The same faces that lit up this week when I walked into their worlds each day will wonder why I didn’t return. And I confess that I am struggling at my deepest levels with that reality.

While I will return to the states to continue my life, their small world of stainless steel cribs and long hours of tedium and medication will continue. And I ask myself this, “What more can I do?”

The answer to that question remains to be found, but it will be. I will not rest until I find that answer and make a long term difference in the lives of these little ones and others like them.

Please join me in praying for the answer. And join me in desiring to be a part of that answer.

 Jesus, please hold these children that I cannot.